Currently reading - Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith
What each gender finds amusing differs greatly. I'm not saying that men and women don't find the same things funny, but there are certains subjects that have definite gender splits. The Three Stoodges. Warner Bros. cartoons. The late columnist Erma Bombeck. Sex & the City.
So what do I do when the male CP's and beta readers find a scene hysterically funny and the female CP's and betas wonder why the hell I thought this scene was remotely amusing?
These things bothered me for a long time until DH pointed out with all gentleness, "Honey, have you noticed you write more like Jim Butcher than Sherrilyn Kenyon?"
I know he meant the comment at a compliment, I took it as a compliment since I LOOOVVVE the Dresden Files, but why did it leave me with an unsettled feeling? Because it made me wonder about my own identity. Am I like the lesbian in the joke who was so butch she wanted a gay relationship with a man? Have I done a complete 360 in my concept of gender?
Ironically, it was Jay Lake's call for recommendations for sf/f material for his pre-teen daughter that made me realize my early reading influences had shaped my writing. A majority of authors that I read, regardless of the author's gender, wrote about adventure. I wasn't interested in character sketches as much as fantastic voyages, buried treasure or riding a fire-breathing dragon.
So I decided to accept that this is how I write, gender be damned. Now to find an agent who loves a good adventure. . .